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I'm sure I'm not the first person to think of it, but it was driving me nuts, so I was driven to rewrite the lyrics of "Paperback Writer" by the Beatles. Sing along, everybody!

Dear Writer's Guild, will you read my piece?
It took me weeks to write, could you read it, please?
It's based on a story by a rat named Matt,
And I had some free time, and I want to be a Metamor Writer
Metamor Writer!

It's an exciting story of an elderly mage,
and an evil curse that's made him underage.
His young apprentice turned into a horse,
but he doesn't mind, and now he wants to be a Metamor Writer
Metamor Writer!

Metamor Writer!

It's a dozen pages, give or take a few,
I'll be writing more in a day or two.
I can add more action if you think that's wise
or I can tone it down, I just want to be a Metamor Writer
Metamor Writer!

If you all approve, we can archive it,
My story could be as long as 'Keeping the Lamp Lit'
If you must reject it, let me know what's wrong,
And I'll fix it up, I just want to be a Metamor Writer
Metamor Writer!

Metamor Writer!

Metamor Writer, Metamor writer!
Metamor Writer, Metamor writer!
Metamor Writer, Metamor writer!
Metamor Writer, Metamor writer!

~Waterboy